God is love. (1 John 4:8).
Each person is born created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27). Therefore, we are born to love and be loved. To take away love is to take away our greatest need. Sadly, many parents in our society fail to love their children the way children need to be loved.
A child who grows up without feeling loved will be a broken adult. The degree of brokenness will vary depending on the resilience of the child and the degree of parental failure to love.
Surely, no parent wants to produce a broken child.
Just as bad, broken children grow up to become broken spouses and parents. The result is dysfunctional people creating dysfunctional marriages and families. The cycle continues and often gets worse with each new generation. Lack of love greatly injures the emotional core of a child. The emotional core is where all of our attitudes about self and relationships are stored.
Children will grow up and use their emotional core to relate to and love their spouses and own children. If this emotional core is damaged their ability to love their spouses and children will be damaged. This can set in motion a generational cycle of broken individuals.
Love Must Be Expressed!
It is too easy for a parent to tell themselves, “I love my child”, but never express that love.
Unexpressed love is as good as NO love. Love must be expressed.
I know a mother who claimed very strongly that she loved her child. When I met with her grown child for counseling the child told me, “I don’t remember one single time while I was growing up of my mother telling me she loved me. Not one single time! I also do not have a single memory of my mother ever hugging me or showing ANY physical affection toward me the entire time I was growing up. I felt totally unloved. Love is empty and useless when it is not expressed.
The Obvious Solution: Parents — EXPRESS your love.
❤️ Tell your children you love them on a regular basis. Daily is best, but at the least, make sure you never let a week pass by without telling them.
❤️ Express your love. Hugs, a pat on the back, a hand on the shoulder — all of these gestures communicate your love.
Note: When your children become teenagers they may resist your physical gestures. This is o.k. Just choose your opportunities more wisely. When their friends are around it may be best to save your hugs for later. But, despite your teen’s protests, don’t ever think your expressions of love — telling them, “I love you”, a hug, or a pat on the back — are not appreciated by them.
❤️ Show your love and support by being involved in their life. Attend their recitals, concerts, and sporting events, when possible. Always find ways to say the important words, “I am so proud of you”.
God has given us the supreme example of what it means to love. He was willing to sacrifice His only begotten Son for the rest of us. (John 3:16) Therefore, love means sacrifice.
Parents, when you willingly sacrifice your time and effort for your children you are expressing your love — and your children will feel loved. Love does not mean you don’t have bad days or are always able to attend every event. You are human, and so is your love. But let the bad days be the exception.
Your children will not remember the exceptions when they are grown. * *They will remember the big picture — the overall experiences of your expressed love for them.
#copied
#bill walker
Deliberate mothers
Dr Titi OLAITAN