Listening is not as easy as it sounds anyway depending on your temperament. But it is an important skill every mom must pay attention to. There are always 1000 other things running through your mind other than just sitting down and listening to anybody talk less of a child’s gist, isn’t it? A lot of us struggle to listen to our children not because we don’t want to but sometimes because we are busy or we are tired and we just want to be left alone.
Listening requires a lot of patience. It can be frustrating especially when you have kids who are naturally expressive and want to talk about everything at the same time. It has been proven that listening to your kids makes it more likely that they listen to you (which most of us want). Meaning that if you want your child to listen to you, you will have to first listen to him/her.
Children who are not heard become the ones who never listen. They will always be under the impression that they are not worthy of your time and attention and that whatever they do, think, or feel is negative. This could affect their confidence and self-esteem. Talking and listening to your child holds a lot of importance as it helps your child build a bond with you and develop trust. It will strengthen the parent-child cord, thereby opening up lines of communication.
So,
🚨Make communication a priority, you can even set a time for it.
🚨Be receptive and have an open mind to all kinds of feelings without getting angry and frustrated.
🚨Be fully in the moment, be present physically and mentally.
🚨Put your devices down.
🚨Be patient and listen as your child puts her feelings and thoughts across.
🚨Notice the body language and decode the non-verbal things your child is trying to say.
🚨 Listen without judgment.
Note: There is no substitute for listening and it cannot be dedicated to someone else. If your child is not talking to you because he/she feels you don’t listen be quite sure that child is talking to someone else.
The truth is not many of us have the skill to listen but with conscious efforts, we can develop it and slowly with practice we can be better at it as well.
God will help us.
Deliberate Mothers.
Dr Titi OLAITAN